Poor Joe. I had no idea you were sick. Feel better soon sounds flimsy for some reason but I really do hope you do. I am in the same sort of predicament with my husband. I think I still love him and we get along sometimes but there are no sparks anymore. There is barely interest left for me. Lately I find myself fantasizing about being with lots of other people but I cant seem to get excited about him. I wish I had your problem with people trying to pick me up. I guess no one is interested in a 24 year old mother who is cant seem to shake her pregnancy weight. :( Oh well. I've made my bed, now I must lie in it. (That's really all I want to do in it with my husband next to me.)Sorry, hope I have grossed you out with thoughts of het sex. But good job on staying loyal and sticking to your guns.
Dear Joe, I kept seeing your messages in discussion of my favorite fanfics, and thought I would check your journal. I am truly sorry you have been ill and I hope your tumor responds to the treatment again. My own brush with a nasty illness which took years to bring under control taught me that one must never lose hope and use all the help one can get to fight it. I hope you stay strong. You know, it may be the drugs you are taking for the tumor that are messing up with your brain chemistry. They did with mine, so I had to go on Prozac to function. After I was allowed off all that, I went natural (found this book useful: Syd Baumel, Dealing with Depression Naturally). But I do not know whether and how the natural way would have worked for my depression with all those drugs in my system.
As a fellow obsessive reader of BBM fanfiction, I cannot help thinking that it must be therapeutical both to write and to read. It certainly works that way for me (that is, reading does, in my case).
You take good care of yourself,